Advocacy, Autonomy, and Emotion Modeling: Why These Skills Matter in Early Childhood

Supporting young children isn’t just about teaching words—it’s about teaching them that their voice matters. Advocacy and autonomy are powerful tools for building confidence, safety, and emotional understanding. When we pair these with emotion modeling, we give toddlers the language they need to express themselves long before they can do it independently.

Why Advocacy Matters for Young Children 

Advocating and teaching autonomy isn’t just valuable—it’s essential for our child’s growth, self-awareness, and safety. When children feel empowered to express their needs, preferences, and boundaries, they learn that: 

• Their body belongs to them 

• Their comfort matters 

• Their words carry meaning 

• They can say “no” 

• Adults listen 

It may not always feel convenient for adults, but hearing a firm “No!” is actually a healthy sign that a child understands boundaries. 

Examples of Healthy Advocacy in Toddlers

• “I don’t want to share.” 

• “That’s mine.” 

• “I don’t want to play.” 

Even when these phrases sound blunt, they teach: 

• Autonomy 

• Consent 

• Emotional awareness 

• Self-advocacy 

How to Model Advocacy Language 

Children learn advocacy by hearing advocacy. We can model short, simple phrases they can eventually use on their own: 

Requesting Help 

• “Help me.” 

• “You do it.” 

ASL + spoken words together reinforce meaning. 

Protecting Their Body 

• “Stop it.” 

• “No thank you.”

• “I don’t like it.” 

If your child looks uncomfortable, confused, or grossed out (like touching cookie dough), you can model: 

• “Yucky! Get it off!” 

• “I need a napkin.” 

Sharing Positive Feelings Too 

Advocacy isn’t just about stopping things—it’s also about expressing joy:

• “This is fun!” 

• “I like it!” 

• “I want more!” 

This shows children that their positive and negative experiences both deserve words. 

Why Modeling Emotions Is Essential (Especially Under Age 3) 

Modeling emotions is one of the most powerful speech–language and social-emotional strategies for toddlers. Here’s why: 

1. It Helps Toddlers Understand What They’re Feeling 

Toddlers feel big emotions, but they don’t yet have the language to match their experiences.

When we say: 

• “You’re sad. You wanted more bubbles.” 

• “You look frustrated. That puzzle is tricky.” 

…we help them connect: 

body sensation + emotion + situation 

This builds emotional vocabulary long before they can speak it independently. 

2. It Shows Them That All Feelings Are Normal

By naming emotions calmly, we teach children: 

• Emotions are safe 

• Grown-ups can help 

• Feelings are not “bad” or scary 

This builds security, self-regulation, and resilience. 

3. It Gives Them Language They Will Later Use

Children imitate what they hear. 

If we model: 

• “I’m tired.” 

• “I’m happy!” 

• “I’m disappointed.”

…children eventually use these same phrases instead of crying, hitting, or melting down. 

4. It Reduces Meltdowns 

When kids can recognize and name feelings like: 

• “I’m mad.” 

• “I need help.” 

…they communicate sooner and more clearly—reducing frustration. Emotion words are tools. 

5. It Builds Empathy and Social Skills

Children who hear emotions labeled begin to understand how others feel:

• “She’s smiling—she feels happy.” 

• “He’s crying—he feels sad.” 

This builds: 

• empathy 

• sharing 

• cooperative play 

• problem-solving 

These skills form the foundation of early friendships.

6. It Strengthens the Parent–Child Connection

Emotion modeling uses: 

• eye contact 

• warmth 

• co-regulation 

It sends a clear message: 

“You’re safe. I’m here. I understand you.” 

This deepens attachment and trust. 

Simple Emotion-Modeling Phrases for Toddlers 

Keep phrases: short, warm, in the moment, specific 

Try: 

• “You’re excited! Jump, jump!” 

• “You’re mad. You wanted the red cup.” 

• “You’re scared. That was loud.” 

• “You’re proud! You did it!” 

• “I feel happy when we play together.”

• “I’m frustrated too. Let’s try again.” 

In Short 

Modeling emotions and advocacy helps toddlers:

• build emotional vocabulary 

• express their needs 

• reduce meltdowns 

• develop empathy 

• learn autonomy 

• stay safe 

• feel heard and understood 

It’s not just speech—it’s connection, confidence, and lifelong communication skills.

Author: Amber Drew, C-SLPA